Like many other people, I suspect, I am emerging shuffling and blinking into the light out of the the fog of the last two weeks. Not Covid, thank goodness but this dreadful, horrendous cold which has been doing the rounds, which developed into bronchitis. I’m still coughing and wheezing, but this week I am pleased to report I think I shall live, unlike my frame of mind over Christmas and beyond!

I feel being so ill has focused my mind because I am feeling a lot more determined to put my creativity front and central to my life. It’s taken a long time to allow myself to step away from the ‘Magic Mummy’ role I assumed for myself. My children are grown up with children of their own, for heaven’s sake. Why do I expect myself to find an answer to all their problems when they aren’t asking me to? Why do I then beat myself up because I can’t? And the heap of metaphorical baggage which I have carted around for years and years has meant I’ve let this feeling of being responsible for everyone weigh me down to the point where my own wants and needs became irrelevant.

No one know how much time any of us have left, so it’s up to us all the make the most of every day. It’s so easy to be overwhelmed by the news, every day another problem or disaster, the cost of living, the climate… All we can do is fight our own little corner, be kind and find joy in the little things.

So, I’m kick starting things with the fabulous book which I bought a day or so ago and which I’ve already read from cover to cover.

Well worth looking out for if you are in a similar position to me, it’s like having a hand to hold! Rachael Taylor’s writing is down to earth and accessible. Buying the book means I have access to a Facebook group so I shall have like minded people to keep me motivated.

One thing I have struggled with is picking up the threads now that Planet Penny as a business is no more. I made the decision to close given the way things were changing after Brexit, and I know it was the right thing to do. Then the pandemic and lockdown did for the very successful local needlefelt workshops I had just started running. So I think something in the stars was telling me to stop!

I have to lose the mindset of failure. It happened to me, not because of me. Planet Penny was my brainchild, I made it happen and it worked. It was a success. And now it’s time for something completely different.

You might have guessed this is somewhat of a pep talk to myself, but I think I shall be sharing my thought processes much more as I try to build on my intentions.

I would be really interested to hear if any of what I have said resonates with you. Is the ‘Magic Mummy’ role a generational thing? I certainly remember that I was brought up that way and despite being the despair of my poor mum with my arty, emotional ways, it rubbed off!

I’ll be back soon, Happy New Year…x